Desiring 2 Delight: Prelude

The next few posts are going to be dedicated to some of my learning and reflection from my summer in Sauble Beach, and what God taught be about Himself...and subsequently about myself.

I grew up in a theological tradition that had a lot of emphasis on the sinfulness of the human heart, and the utter depravity (can you guess which tradition?) of humanity. Although there was (is) a strong emphasis on grace as a theological concept in this tradition, I realized that I had not fully learned how to accept grace with myself. Yes, not only did I understand (in my head) that I needed grace and was sinful, but I did see it in my own heart and life. I was sinful. My heart was not inclined towards service, but was inclined to selfish.

I remember taking an introduction to biblical counseling course when I was in university, and, what I remember most keenly was how physically sick I felt for about a week after that course. After spending forty hours thinking and meditating, learning and reflecting on the human condition, I felt that someone had shown me the darkness of my own heart and the inclination of my flesh, and what I saw was so heinous it made me sick; I was, quite literally, carrying around with me my own worst enemy. 

Now before you all jump up and shout about the need for the balance of grace, I want you to stop and ask yourself if you truly and deeply, and honestly, have considered your own sinfulness. I believe that too often these days, we pridefully make assumptions about our own ability and our own morality. I mean, its not like we are killing anyone, or stealing. We all lead decently moral lives it seems.

But is that what God wants? Decently moral people? In my opinion, morality can be the carbon dioxide of the Christian life; it silently and slowly lulls us to sleep because we less and less believe in the need for grace in our lives. Morality is not about a relationship with God, it is a lifestyle that is meant to be a by-product of a relationship with God. Sadly though, often even the church is unable to differentiate between whether a moral lifestyle is just that: a moral lifestyle. Or whether it is a manifestation of a transformed heart.

I was having dinner this summer with a couple from a church I was working with (at), and over dinner we were talking about how church is becoming more and more irrelevant for young people. He said to me, "I just don't think that people think they are sinners any more." How true that is. People no longer think they are sinners in need of grace.

Do you honestly believe and see your need for grace? 

***keep reading next post - because this is VERY related to delight - but as someone wise once said "there is a time for everything..."