Alas...the death of chivalry and the birth of confusion!

The following post may seem a bit random, but it has come from some recent conversations with friends and family on the nature of how guys and girls (men and women) are supposed to interact (this does not just refer to dating relationships but between friends of different genders as well). My purpose here is two-fold: 1) I hope to remind people of what chivalry actually is and 2) create freedom for the expression of chivalry.

First, if a man holds a door for a woman, she may respond with "thanks," and then proceeds through the door. If he holds the door for the woman after her, she may respond with "who do you think you are?" or "are you saying I can't hold open my own door?" and then angrily wait for the man to proceed through the door. One act, two women, two very different reactions. What's a guy to do? Well, in the end, I think more and more are choosing to do nothing.

In the words of my mom "well, it is all just so confusing."

What has happened here? Chivalry was the the code of conduct that came out of the medieval times and was specifically associated with knights. Over centuries it has come to be associated with the character of knights and gentlemen, and included: bravery, courage, service, loyalty, generosity and courtly love. In the past, chivalry was about the character and the honor of the man, which was expressed through his care and treatment of a woman.

However, in a society that is immensely self-obsessed, when a chivalrous act is done by a man, a woman will make it about her, and what this man is saying about her. Ladies, I am sorry to tell you this but: CHIVALRY IS NOT ABOUT YOU.

Men: Chivalry is about your principles and out of that flows how you believe women should be treated. So make a choice for yourself about how you think women should be treated, and be consistent in that. Treat every woman with that same standard. (Which I hope will be a high standard.) I have a male friend who does this very well: he will do things like open the door for a girl and will walk on the side closest to the road when we are walking on the street. He does this for every girl.
Women: When a man extends chivalry, stop making it about you, and allow it to be about him. For some reason we have made the expression of chivalry about us...when it isn't. So in the case of my friend, I see that this is about his principles and not about his view of me or my competence. So I let him treat me this way, and honestly, it is nice. And making that choice is the act of a principled person...so this also says something about me to...when it isn't about me. Ironic isn't it?

May the games begin!

when you are bored...or procrastinating...or writing a paper...

write a song...to the tune of Three Blind Mice (or Hot Cross Buns)

Here is mine...

I am bored
I am bored
Papers are dumb
Papers are dumb
I'd rather be cleaning the bathroom floor
Or shutting ten fingers hard in the door
I am bored
I am bored

What's your song?!?!

FIY

The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache.

oh canada

I am not really a donut person. But today I just really wanted a Maple Dip donut from Tim Horton's. A little taste of home.

For that same reason I refuse to by Cheerios here - the smell and the sound of them hitting the bowl should only occur in my kitchen in Canada with my siblings fighting over who gets the last bowl of Lucky Charms.

\manda

Long overdue update...

This post is probably WAY overdue - but in the course of being tired of teaching - I happen to get tired of everything else too. And this includes blogging. (sorry folks, I am trying here.)

So three weekends ago we had this great plan to drive to El Salvador for a three day weekend. People - we had even booked into a SURF CAMP - I was going to learn how to surf - with grace and poise and....trying not to look like a pregnant caribou.

Problem 1: Car become emotionally unstable.

Problem 2: People become decisionally unstable.

Solution 1: Take car as far as capital (2 hours not the 8 planned)

Solution 2: Split group up.

So Katharine, Megan, and I spent the weekend taking in the capital of Honduras - while the other three went to El Salvador. We drove around Tegus in the late night - (see above picture) and saw it from both sides of the city.

The next day we slept in late (poor Marlon had to go and "do dentistry" in the early morning), watched cable TV (some things are VERY exciting) and then headed to Valle de Angeles (Literally Valley of the Angles - see picture right) where there is lots of things to buy and is (supposed to be) kinda the center of where people who make pottery, textiles, etc. are located.)

We had a great lunch at a place owned by a German lady- hey I'm excited when I get food that reminds me of Europe - anyways. We were talking about the police and she said that one time she was pulled over by the police (I think for having one of her headlights out) and she was ticketed. She said that the officer told her she could just pay him (in other words he would take a bribe) but she refused and was thrown in jail. Such is life.

We then drove back into Tegus and spent the evening watching a Mexican theater group perform at the Tegus Theater. Honestly, the play was so ridiculous that I was crying from laughing so hard for a good hour. We went home and slept.

The next morning we took a trip to Price-Mart. It was here that we realized that if we came to Tegus once and a while there was only a few small things (such as Swiss Chalet gravy;) that we would have to go without. It is the exact same as Costco in Canada. (That is Katharine pushing Megan who broke her foot - and Megan pushing the buggy.) I had my lunch there - snacking on the sample food. Guys - they even had the 'restaurant' after the checkout - and the picture of the hot dog was the EXACT same as my home Costco! Crazy!!! (I may have gotten slightly homesick in Aisle 8 but in Aisle 9 I was over it.) We then headed back to Sigua - with our car laden with groceries. I do want to share that my first sip of Cranberry Juice WAS amazing.

Hey. I need to be excited over little things.

For more pics if you are interested:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=117490&l=c773d&id=503730343

Earliest Easter for the rest of our lives!

This year is the earliest Easter any of us will eversee the rest of our lives! And only the most elderly of our population have ever seen it this early (95 years old or above!). And none of us have ever, or will ever, see it a day earlier!
Here's the facts:
1) The next time Easter will be this early (March 23) will be the year 2228 (220 years from now). The last time it was this early was 1913 (so if you're 95 orolder, you are the only ones that were around for that!).
2) The next time it will be a day earlier, March 22,will be in the year 2285 (277 years from now). The last time it was on March 22 was 1818. So, no one alive today has or will ever see it any earlier than this year!

\manda